Say Hello to My Little Friend...

Scarface is on, thinking of u!

Hmmm, I feel so flattered that you're thinking of me. Is it because I cut people up with chainsaws? Because I was responsible for bringing cocaine to Miami? Is it because I'm paranoid due to my amazing drug use? I really hope so.

Top Secret

Yes that is a diagram of the new ac condensing unit plan. No notes yet but there are the basic dimensions. Will call in a bit.


I feel like this is all top secret information...except, I never got the ac condensing unit plan to look at in the first place.

Can you tell me how to get to sesame street

What up veggie, I mean cookie monster?


Awesome! I got a text from Snuffy

Weekend at Bernies

I can't sleep i feel sleep one hour and bernie jumped on the bed.

a) liar! You can sleep...you "sleep one hour".
b) Kill Bernie and you'll be able to sleep better (that's a joke...because if Bernie is a dog, that's what dogs do...and, I don't saction murder anyways)

Herrrrrrrrrre's Cory!

hiiiiiiiiiiii it's cory


Hiiiiiiiii it's Melina! Who are you cory?

Love! Now with fewer letters!

I love u n always will.


It's a shame that you can't waste an extra second and add the "yo" and the a and the d". Then maybe I'd let you love me...oh wait, no I won't.

It's always sunny in Philadelphia

Eric and I are at tropical cafe.

Nice! John and I are freezing our asses off in PA...what's your point?

Just the facts, ma'am

3510 member's club blvd southport nc 28461

Great, now I know where to send the postcards and Christmas cards...oh wait! I don't know you...nevermind.

She's Crafty, She Gets Around

Will miss you next weekend lake eola craft show wish you were here.

Unfortunately Pink Floyd, that is one place I never wish to be...
But to be charitable, I wish you were here.

I love a challenge

Let's see how good you are at text messages. IT WAS FUNNY WHEN MY PURSE RANG AT THE MEETING IT WOKE ME UP!

I am very good at texting...I am even better at sending texts to the right people. I find the funny part not to be the fact that my (not my) text woke you up but that you chose to write the second half all in caps. Why??

Halloween Humor-text style

If one drop of semen has more life in it than one drop of blood. Why doesn't Dracula suck dick instead?

When I showed this one to my husband this one he said..."That's a big IF".

The Doctor is In

(Your love)I feel much better love. My throat doesn't hurt anymore and I just have a sniffle here and there.

Well then, my love has healed you. The cool part? I don't even know you...the cooler part? You don't seem to care because I sent you four texts stating that I didn't know you and that you had the wrong number!!!